Have you ever considered being tied up or tying your lover with a rope? This is a kinky feeling that most people experience – even more people than you can imagine. However, before you proceed, you need to learn the basics so that you and your partner will remain safe.
As you first begin, you might have a lot of questions running through your mind – questions such as the type of rope to use, the body parts you can tie, if you can harm your partner or yourself while at it, how to inform your partner about your fantasies, and things you should do if the act goes wrong.
What is Bondage?
The first letter in the BDSM has to do with consensually binding, tying, or restraining your lover to achieve erotic stimulation. Remember that when it comes to pleasure, there are no shortcuts – you can’t replace the amount of time you put it, your patience, levels of intimacy.
Perhaps, as a couple, you have tried using sex toys or sex apps with your lover to explore your sexualities. However, it can be difficult to introduce something that brings up pictures of fetish leather gears, masks, and ropes into your sex lives.
Why is Bondage so Attractive?
Everybody gets into bondage for several reasons. You can experience an exciting flow of adrenaline as you playfully struggle against your partner’s restraints. Also, the senses of your body get increased when you get blindfolded; remember how you felt when your eyes were closed during a massage? You get a much better feeling.
How to Tie Bondage
Before you proceed, you need to consider the kind of rope to use, its length and thickness, how easily it coils, ways to finish off the ends of the ropes, and the best ways to store the ropes.
As your practice bondage sex, you’ll apply four knotting styles most of the time. Learn and practice them constantly until the memories in your muscles are strong enough that you can tie them easily. The knots are:
- Overhand or double overhand: This is a simple knot that’s mostly used to finish the end of a rope to prevent it from fraying – it is used as a stop-knot
- Square or surgeon’s knot: It is considered a basic knot for joining the ends of a rope. This knot is used to tie off or finish off various ties
- Lark’s head knot: This collapsing or sliding knot is one of the simplest. Don’t directly use it for bondage, but as the first step in other rope knots
- Half-hitches: This basic building block of most knot styles helps you efficiently wrap a rope around an object
Key Rules for Safely Tying your Partner
Remember that anything that has to do with bondage has to be carried out under basic trust and consent. Even during the most basic tying, always ensure that your partner is feeling safe and gaining pleasure from the act. When it comes to basic rope bondage, you need to take some precautions, such as:
- Prevent cutting blood circulation; ensure that one or two of your fingers can fit underneath the knots you’re creating. By doing this, your partner will be restrained delightfully, and not get hurt in the process
- As a beginner, you should avoid doing any bondage tie around your neck region
- After tying up your partner, don’t leave them unattended to – they should always feel safe
- Have scissors close by in case you find it difficult untying a knot, or you want to quickly free up your partner
- Know the places the nerve centers are found on the body and note if your partner is on any meds or has injured in the past
- Keep an eye out for reduced temperature, skin discolorations, or tingling sensations – these could indicate circulatory issues
- As you tie, ensure that the coils are side by side – avoid crossing the rope
- Practice aftercare because the intensity of getting tied can be tiring to both the mind and the body; you and your partner, therefore, need time to take care of your emotional and physical needs
Tips for Successful Bondage
- Avoid trying it with strangers
According to professionals, don’t practice bondage with someone you are not familiar with – such as people you’re just meeting on dating apps.
- Give your partner some hints
A lot of individuals hate trying out bondage because they are not aware of ways to speak about the idea with their lover. It is recommended that you get some erotic fiction related to bondage, or a DVD to watch with your partner in the comfort of your house.
This is the very first step before you consider things to buy. Drop the idea in the mind of your partner that it is something you’re opened to trying. You’d be surprised that they also share that fantasy.
- Avoid myths about bondage
This fantasy has a reputation; however, it is a great way of having a deeper relationship. When someone hears of the word bondage, their imaginations go to just whips, chains, and other scary things. But bondage is much more fun and enjoyable if done in the right circumstances.
- Be careful while selecting a position
People getting into bondage for the first time often feel the urge to decide if they are the dominant or the submissive partner. This is not important as a first-timer. You don’t have to pick one. As you get into it, you might discover that you favor one more than the other, or hate your choice. It is both to try out both roles at the beginning.
- Keep things simple and interesting
As a beginner, you should start simple. Avoid the urge to introduce a lot of tools – your partner might find that intimidating, or it can make things more complicated which can cause distractions rather than pleasure.
- Communicate
It is important to establish mutual consent as you plan. Bondage needs a surrender of control, total trust, and safety; these depend on the communication of both partners. Ensure that you have a safe word, set limits, and respect them during the act. Plan in case something doesn’t go as planned.
Bottom Line
Bondage is much more than just a historical representation of medieval thralldom, or an awkward fetish desire. It is a vital part of the normal sexual fantasies of a lot of people – and has become an important part of the lives of most people. While engaging in bondage for the first time, it is important to follow the safety tips above.